A day in life of a samosa lover

SL goes for a job interview.

Interviewer :- Hello Mr SL. How are you feeling today?

Samosa Lover :- Good Morning sir. I am fine sir. Thank You.

<right then Office Boy enters>

OB – Sir?

I – OB get me a cup of tea. <to SL> Will you have anything SL?

SL – I will have a samosa sir.

I – What?

SL – Samosa sir. The best ever Indian Snack.

I – <To OB>. OB please get him a Samosa. <Thinks a little> Ok… I will have one too. Also get the green chutney. <to SL> So Mr SL tell me about yourself?

<OB walks out>

SL – Sir my name is SL. I live in Samose Wali Gali area of this city. I like Samosas very much.

I – What? Be serious SL this is a job interview.

SL – But Sir I AM serious. I love Samosa. I think everyone should have Samosas regularly.

I – Whatever. Tell me why should we select you? What is so different in you from others?

SL – Sir I think, I am full of conviction and give my fullest to whatever I am doing?

I – Good. That's a good answer SL. Give me an example from your past.

SL – Sir like I said I love samosas very much. Once I decided to have samosas from all shops of our city. It took my one year to do this sir, But I am confident that I have covered 99 pc of the Samosa Walas. Infact I can tell from which shop a samosa has been bought by tasting it.

I – Impossible. I don't believe you.

SL – No sir it is very much possible. You get unique combinations of samosa and the chutney. With practice you can master it.

I – Nonsense. Nonsense I say. Have you done anything else other than eating samosas in your life. Tell me what are your long term and short term plans?

SL – Sir short term plans are to get a good job so that I can fulfill my long term plans which are to travel all over the country and try samosas from different cities.

I – SL, I have listened to your nonsense for very long time now. This is your last chance. Answer this question seriously. What are your views about westernization of our culture?

SL – Sir, I think the westernization is very bad sir. People are doing unimaginable things. Our whole country looks like a strange place to me. Earlier everywhere you went, you could see samosa walas selling samosas of different kinds. Paneer samosa, matar samosa, aaloo samosa.. but now sir it saddens me to see that you cant find a single samosa wala in so many parts of the city. You will find people it pizzas and pastas and sandwich and what not. Burgers are the worst of it sir. I hate this westernization.

I – enough is enough. <trying to maintain his composure> SL, I think I don't have anything more to ask. We will let you know about the result if you are selected. Is there anything you want to ask?

SL – Yes sir, where do you get the samosas in your canteen sir. I had one while waiting for my turn. Very nice and even though I am an expert I could not recognize the taste. Very good samosa sir, very good.

I - <Goes crazy completely> GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT. DON'T EVER SHOW YOUR SAMOSA… I MEAN FACE TO ME AGAIN. GET OUT.

SL - <rushes out of the room>

< I rings the bell to call the office boy. OB enters the room looking shocked and out of breath>

I – What happened to you. Why do you look so shaken.

OB – Sir that boy sir… he took the samosas.. forcibly sir. I gave him his samosa… but he took yours from the plate sir. I chased him sir but he ran like he had stolen the Kohinoor.

<I faints on hearing the word samosa. Outside SL is delving in the most wondrous samosas ever and thinking about a day well spent>

The End

Diwali at Home.

I have never spent a Diwali away from home. So first I thank God for that and pray for never ever spending Diwali alone away from my family and Chandigarh.

Every year Dad and I put up lights one day before Diwali. Every year i get some sort of daant from Dad because I end up messing something up. Sometimes I break too many bulbs or sometimes its the stool on which I am standing falls. Also he tells me every year that I did not take my workshop lessons in college seriously because if I had taken them more seriously I would not be so clumsy with pliers and other electric stuff. Its not that I am incapable of doing it but on Diwali its a tradition. Something goes wrong. This year I cut the strings with which we tie the lights on the railing too short. I love spending pre Diwali day with my Dad.

Things have changed a lot. I do not burst crackers anymore. Its not because I care about the environment shit or whatever. I just dont feel very excited about them. I think its the growing up stuff that has happened with me. However I still love the paper scrap that is left after people burst a 1000 wali ladi. I still go to the terrace next morning and see how many rockets fell on our house last night. I love the smell of the smoke that fills the air after people are done with bursting crackers all night. I think the kids of this generation are big time wusses. They are scared of bursting crackers. Also their parents should encourage them to burst crackers. Their children in all probability will be facing only higher level of pollution and noise in future. Parents should prepare their children for future. Its ok if you burst crackers one night of the year. Not that Mt Everest will melt coz of that.

Now, I am not insensitive or anything but what I am going to say in the next few lines may offend people and make them think that I am. Lot of accidents happen on Diwali night. Many of them are caused by rockets flying in the wrong direction. There is a culprit behind this increased no of accidents due to these maverick rockets. And the culprit is Coca Cola company. In fact all soft drink manufacturers. Let me explain. Few years ago the size of rockets was not very large. They could easily fit in the 300 ml GLASS bottle. Now the glass was able to support the weight of the rocket and the rockets would go up and only up. Slowly the size of rockets started increasing and the 300ml bottle was not enough. However to solve the problem, people started using the 1 L Glass bottle. The rockets still flew str8 up. However these days the rocket size is at its largest and the soft drink bottlers have stopped using glass bottles. All you get are pet bottles. See pet bottles even large enough to handle the weight of today's rockets are not fit. When you light a rocket the fire coming out of its... err .. ass melts the bottle and it tilts in some stupid direction which is not up causing the rockets to go in whichever direction. This my friends causes so many accidents these days. Coke(or Pepsi, based on your taste) is to blame.

Bad Luck Jokes and Reality

~<0>~

disclaimer :- all comics are based on real incidents.

~<0>~

If I think about it, I feel that I had three very lucky mornings in college. But in the end i think it all went wrong coz of bad luck.

I am sometimes ashamed at the things I think were my high points.

Thinking about past is stupid and now talking about past, I remember the very amazing glass of juice i had this afternoon.

~<0>~

Damn! Now I feel stupid as well as ashamed.

~<0>~

Search is on, as usual

Some people devote years and years looking for things they really believe in. Every waking moment of theirs is spent in fighting for that something. But sometimes they get so used to this struggle and wait that they forget what they will do once, if ever, they get what they want. Their whole lives are so intervowen with their search that after their victory the drill to detatch themselves from the habbits and practices of their quest is a tougher job for them. Some who realise this, at a sub-concious level do not wish to actually win.

For example :-

1. The Naxalites :- The naxalite moment is still on in some states like orrissa and Andhra Pradesh. But it has now reduced to only few people who have no other thing to do in life. They have become dacoits and have absolutely no clue what they will do in case they are given a chance to run a government. 

2. Communist Party :- very similiarly they have no clue about their policies on issues other than preaching anti-americanism, if they actually ever win a general election. 

3. Man's best friend :- Dogs. They keep sniffing here and there for something. I am absolutely sure that even if a dog is able to find what its ancestors have been looking for, it will not believe that it has ended a search which was on since times so so long back.

and last but not the least.

4. Yours truly  :- )

Web Comic :)

pbhhhttt...

years it took to know you
it took moments to forget
i know i said i loved you
now i say it with regret

how beautiful you were back then
and look at you now, you twit
how alone you seem now
but when you had love, you blew it

you wear those glitzy dresses
still how naked you feel
just do one thing to help yourself
get a life, get real

its easy money you always wanted
well you got it and got rich
i just got this one word for you
you mother fuckin B.I.T.C.H